Have you ever asked someone “how are you” and their response was not the default “I’m good” but what they honestly were truly feeling? Boy I bet you got a shock, didn’t you? Asking someone how they are is a common conversation starter as well as a casual greeting, but except for your therapist, no one truly wants to know exactly how you are doing, or feeling at that moment.
Because our emotional state is usually “our dirty little secret”. We are hesitant to share it with just anyone because we fear judgment, oversharing, and because people don’t really want to know how we truly feel.
Last month I went to a Meet & Greet Pancake breakfast at my daughter’s school. It was a fun and casual day to meet all the new incoming preschoolers and their families. Despite my sleep deprived state and carrying my 14-month-old around, I managed to meet many families and have a pretty okay day. I am on the board at school and the participation/enrollment chair, so I essentially wanted to put a face to all the names on the incoming roster.
Besides, it is easier to work with parents if you know their faces, names and their little ones.
After the day was over, I dragged my exhausted butt home with the kids, but on the way I kept thinking something. In all my discussions with the parents, I kept saying that “summer was hard”, “it is so hard”, and “she was bored”. 😐 ugh! Summer was hard because Arya was bored at home. She wanted to go outside but there were so many scorching hot days and she could not do that. And she missed her friends and her teacher and kept whining about it also. On top of that, I was working a lot and taking care of the baby, and cooking, and trying to entertain Arya was super hard.
Surely, I made a list of things to do with her, which we somewhat did, and she got to do her art and imaginary play etc. And she also got to play with her Kidloland and watch TV even, but despite that, she missed school. Heck, even I missed school! 😐
So, all in all, summer was hard! Mom life IS hard! But normally I don’t announce it to everyone, especially NOT to strangers I just met. But that day, I kept sharing my hectic summer endeavor with several moms. I think I remember getting a few weird and surprised stares but most of them agreed with me whole heartedly. I, on the other hand felt guilty and embarrassed ..but after the fact of course! 🤦♀️
OVERTHINKING MODE ON:
Why can’t we be honest about how mom life is? Why does it have to be glorified? We all know the reality of being a mom and having to balance everything on our noses. So why should we feel guilty or be judged?
Have you ever over-shared stuff about your mom life or kids with strangers?
Aside from whining on Instagram and making general agreements that MOM LIFE IS HARD, what are you guilty of over-sharing?